"there's only one way of eating an elephant.."

"One piece at a time."

Desmond Tutu referred to this old quote in the 2010 documentary, "I Am."

To be honest, I just decided to watch the documentary tonight on Netflix because I finished the show I have been wasting my time on for the past few weeks and just needed another excuse to put off packing. But, it's amazing how incredibly productive these seemingly unproductive decisions can turn out to be!

I'm going to just put this out there right away: please watch this documentary. 20 minutes into watching it, I knew I wanted to write something about it. But now that it's over, I still don't really know what to write - just that it's beautiful, and hits the goals and mission of this blog to a T.

For starters, it was the project of director Tom Shadyac.

(Yeah, that didn't mean anything to me at first either...) 

Tom is the man behind Jim Carrey's butt talking in Ace Ventura, he directed my personal favorite in Evan Almighty, and, well, is responsible for this. When I found out his background in the intro, I was a little skeptical... But his personal transformation that was showcased throughout this documentary - and how seriously he took it - is outstanding. I could talk about it, but I want you to watch it, so I'm not going to. Sorry.

Secondly, as easily as it could be written off as one of those "hippie, feel good" documentaries after reading its description, or hearing hippie-feel-gooders like me talk about it, but it has so much focus on SCIENCE. The minute I knew I was hooked on the message of this project was after I heard one of the interviewees - a scientist, mind you - refer to Charles Darwin's "The Descent of Man." He pointed out that Darwin mentions the idea of "the survival of the fittest" only 2 times, whereas he refers to "love" 95 times. Darwin has so much focus on the SCIENCE that human nature is about cooperation and connectedness, yet our society wants to highlight "the survival of the fittest" because of our tendency for competition, and greed. Isn't that incredible? Again, not talking about it any more. Watch.

OK, so, I guess my decision of not leaking too much info so that readers will watch the documentary is not very conducive to my plan of writing about it. But that's OK. I wanted to make sure that it was highlighted even in the tiniest bit because it rings so true to the things I've been talking about on here: how we are to work together as a society to see change, how we need to acknowledge that violence is not going to produce it, and that change can begin even through the smallest of actions.

Desmond Tutu followed the elephant quote with this, which is what hit my heart the sweetest, and what I'd like to leave you all with tonight:

"And so... you can't do anything about global poverty. But yes, you can do something about... this guy...

...because, you know, the sea is really only raindrops coming together."

Thanks for the simple reminder, Mr. Tutu.

[On a side note, I really need to get myself to South Africa one of these days...]

a note on optimisim.

To say that this past week has been an emotional roller coaster would be an understatement. (Did I already start another post off that way? I think I did. Clearly a classic blog intro.) As some of you know, I've just reached the end of a month-long interview process for a job that I was very excited for. I ended up being one of two final interviewees out of a large pool of candidates; but unfortunately, it came down to experience, and I just haven't had enough under my 23-year-old belt.

It took me from feeling extremely confident that I'd be starting a new job I'd love, finding a place to live for me and Madame George, and beginning a life in Portland that I've been so anxious for - all within the next two weeks - to TOTALLY being back to square one. No other prospective job opportunities, ideas of cities to live in... seriously, nada.

So, naturally, I freaked out.

And I'm still freaking out to be honest. But it's turned slightly more into a "wow, this is a beautiful twist of fate" vs. "wow, this is the worst thing that's even happened to me and I'm going to die" freak out.

Yesterday I went surfing for the first time with some lovely friends (I swear this is not a total change of subject...). Between me getting pulverized by waves and constantly following incorrect guidance from Jeff (i.e. standing on top of my board rather than standing on the actual ground, which was only 2 inches below), I got some time to go sit out on the waves and just think.

There I was, sitting in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, along the gorgeous rocky Oregon coast, watching the sun go down, doing something I was convinced I'd never have the confidence to try - all with amazing company. 24 hours before that, I was eating a carton of ice cream and drinking wine and crying about my life and the fact that I will never succeed at anything. One week before, I was on a camping trip of a lifetime with one of my dearest friends from the east coast. 330 days before that, I was settling into Corvallis and scared to death at the daunting task of ever making Oregon my home. And here I am, 27 days left before I need to find a new place to live, and the future is wide open.

>> My point is, it's amazing how quickly things can turn around. You can go from having the worst day of your life to the best in a matter of hours. One scary or unfortunate event can be turned into something you're eternally grateful for down the road. And I think that's pretty neat.

At least in my experiences, I've found that one of the most beautiful things about life is its unpredictability. Before leaving for our surf trip, I spent most of the day yesterday applying to jobs. I decided to apply to the same number of jobs in each city that I'm looking at, just to make the odds a little easier for fate to present itself. ;) I think one of the biggest reasons I don't want to leave Oregon is because being here always presents me with an opportunity at adventure; but I've decided that, really, anywhere life decides to take me, it's my responsibility to make it an exciting trip.