It took me from feeling extremely confident that I'd be starting a new job I'd love, finding a place to live for me and Madame George, and beginning a life in Portland that I've been so anxious for - all within the next two weeks - to TOTALLY being back to square one. No other prospective job opportunities, ideas of cities to live in... seriously, nada.
So, naturally, I freaked out.
And I'm still freaking out to be honest. But it's turned slightly more into a "wow, this is a beautiful twist of fate" vs. "wow, this is the worst thing that's even happened to me and I'm going to die" freak out.
Yesterday I went surfing for the first time with some lovely friends (I swear this is not a total change of subject...). Between me getting pulverized by waves and constantly following incorrect guidance from Jeff (i.e. standing on top of my board rather than standing on the actual ground, which was only 2 inches below), I got some time to go sit out on the waves and just think.
There I was, sitting in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, along the gorgeous rocky Oregon coast, watching the sun go down, doing something I was convinced I'd never have the confidence to try - all with amazing company. 24 hours before that, I was eating a carton of ice cream and drinking wine and crying about my life and the fact that I will never succeed at anything. One week before, I was on a camping trip of a lifetime with one of my dearest friends from the east coast. 330 days before that, I was settling into Corvallis and scared to death at the daunting task of ever making Oregon my home. And here I am, 27 days left before I need to find a new place to live, and the future is wide open.
>> My point is, it's amazing how quickly things can turn around. You can go from having the worst day of your life to the best in a matter of hours. One scary or unfortunate event can be turned into something you're eternally grateful for down the road. And I think that's pretty neat.
At least in my experiences, I've found that one of the most beautiful things about life is its unpredictability. Before leaving for our surf trip, I spent most of the day yesterday applying to jobs. I decided to apply to the same number of jobs in each city that I'm looking at, just to make the odds a little easier for fate to present itself. ;) I think one of the biggest reasons I don't want to leave Oregon is because being here always presents me with an opportunity at adventure; but I've decided that, really, anywhere life decides to take me, it's my responsibility to make it an exciting trip.
